Back to work - muscle issues!

For the section of the population who return to work tomorrow, you have my fullest sympathy. For those who carried on working throughout the festive break you at least don't have the body/mental shock of getting back into routine.

I started back at work last Friday at Diss Market. It was bitterly cold, damp and traders were few. In fact when I turned up it looked like it was only going to be the flower stall and myself standing. In truth, although I had been concerned about the early start after all the wonderful lazy lie ins for nearly two weeks, I awoke eager and ready to go and turned up even earlier than usual.

"What are you doing here?" Shrieked a lady who often drops in for a chat.

"Well it's my job, I've got to earn money (ha ha), this is what I do and that is why I'm here." I yelled this back good naturedly careful to leave any sarcasm out.

It was an awesomely boring day and if it hadn't been for the great couple who run the flower stall keeping me intermittently warm with their heater and chatter, it would have been pretty lonely too despite the welcome company of a few regulars.

Yesterday at Sheringham market it was equally cold but not as damp so a little more bearable. Realising I was getting a bit hunched in reaction to the cold, I did a few lively exercises which warmed up my feet a bit (my new snowboots are good but the icyness was permeating even through them to my toes.)

Later that evening after a nice hot bath I curled up on the sofa dozing in front of Oliver Twist dreaming of the teenage crush I'd once had on Oliver Reed. 'Lord I'm getting old' I thought 'it's around eight thirty on a Saturday night and I'm already half asleep with a belly full of spaghetti bolgonese, and drowsy with a couple of glasses of red wine!'

The dozing didn't last long, suddenly a fizzing numbness gripped my left leg. Pins and needles had attacked with great force. Groaning I tried to stand up but not having any feeling at all in the leg, fell straight back onto the sofa. My partner ignored me and carried on watching Oliver Reed trying to be horrible Bill Sikes yet still managing to be totally gorgeous. I tried again until I managed to shake some life back into it and staggered into the kitchen to make tea.

Half an hour later I gave up the fight against unconsciousness and went to bed where my arm started to emulate the leg. How come circulation ceased after all the preventative exercise I did? These were my last thoughts as I disappeared into the land of nod.

I woke late only to do that shrug, yawn thing which immediately produced a painful muscle cramp in my shoulder. Two days back out in the fresh air and I'm a wreck already! So much for a restorative break.

I wish everyone else better luck with their return to work. (and my sympathies to those who no longer have a job to go to - try taking up a career as a masseuse, I need you!)