Market Characters

While markets harbour zillions of different characters, market traders fall into their own special categories. Most markets have at least one of the following.


Mr Boastful has always had a good day regardless of any negative factors every trader encounters on a regular basis. He will happily tell you exactly how well he did last Wednesday when every other trader who was present at the self same market knows jolly well it was a hopeless day. ‘I know the others were struggling, but I had my best day this month.’ (Then gives outlandish figure!)

Mr Boastful used to have a stall three times as big as it is now but then he realised he could take just as much if not more by downsizing. Am sure Freud would have something to say about the constant referrals to size of frontage (these means the length of the stall.)

Then there is the Moaner. Markets aren’t what they used to be (true but the same could be said of all retail at the moment). The Moaner always ends up next to someone he or she doesn’t like, who talks too much, too little or has nothing to say of any importance. The Moaner nearly always starts late and finishes early and then complains about the lack of business.

The Story Teller is always full of beans and has a different tale for every day of the week. If there isn’t an imaginative story to tell then there is a smutty joke or two. Sometimes the stories are almost true but the elaborations are so entertaining, who cares?

The Loner rarely converses with anyone this is either due to acute shyness or a complete lack of interest in participating with others. Market trading is a strange occupation for anyone who isn’t keen on interaction but it happens. It is hard to know if The Loner even passes the time of day with customers.

The Know It All can hold court for hours. If you see the same customer trapped for hours on his or her stall you will know they are being treated to a lengthy session of ‘putting the world to rights’. The Know It All is always first in line to help The Newcomer (see below.) The Know It All has been a trader for a hundred years and you can't tell them anything (and they don't listen much anyhow.)

The Wide Boy has done a great deal on the goods spread out before him; he bought the whole container ‘for a song.’ He always has a product before it hits the stores and will ‘make a killing’ then switch to something new. You won’t see Wide Boy at the same market every week as he works in circuits.

The Newcomer turns up earlier than anyone else looking anxious to get a pitch. Their stall bars are all shiny and new and they try to look like they know what they are doing and usually fail miserably. Everyone ignores The Newcomer.

The Pitcher is never popular as he attracts punters away from other stalls purely by volume of noise. Constantly reiterating the same sales pitch they drive their neighbours to distraction.

I've already mentioned The Flibbertigibbet in a previous post so check that one out for details!

Dare to be Different

The British are known for eccentricity, doing it ‘our’ way, not going with the flow and this is what I love about our culture. We can take being called eccentric as a compliment.

If I turned up at market and didn’t see a man striding down the gangway in an oversize Guinness hat or another wearing flowered Wellies and carrying a Prada style handbag I perhaps wouldn’t feel at home at all.

Being a little bit strange seems perfectly normal in our society. We see all life out in the open air and you do come to realise what eccentric means. There comes a time when you give up asking why and simply ask when the next one will be coming along. You know, the one with the snake wrapped around his neck, the parrot on the shoulder or the dog on the trolley. The pets are as eccentric as the humans.

Walk onto any market in the land and you will see replica stalls. I experienced this some time ago, many miles from here. Some are so similar I half expected to see recognisable faces appear from behind the bags, sweets or flowers. Only occasionally does anyone dare to be different. Supposedly there are only so many items that can be sold in the open air and this dictates what they will be.

It isn’t easy to step out of the ‘norm’ but it becomes increasingly necessary to find quirky ways to attract attention. If all the high streets look the same and there are clone stalls throughout the country, is it time to stand out and be counted? We can do eccentric if the mood takes us but would the ‘normal’ punters understand or desert.

An oriental flavour might be good, a stall selling edible bugs, it’s not unusual to yawn and swallow one anyway in the summer. Or maybe electric wheelchairs for dogs, it would save dragging that trolley about. A hat stall perhaps; selling oversize hats for those who feel a need to, well, wear oversize hats. Garishly printed clothing for those who don’t see a need to mix and match. Handbags with an outer pocket for small dogs. I could go on forever.

Maybe we are missing an opportunity to cater to the marginal sections of society. To run this along side the run of the mill items would indeed be a challenge. However many customers entrance us with their whacky ways, how many of us respond with whacky items to suit their needs? It does happen but the line was drawn at inflatable dollies and sheep some summers ago.

How to make people stop, stare and buy. If I ever find the answer I will bottle it and set up a whole new stall.

This could be the way forward for markets, daring to be different to attract a whole new world of punters.

The Market Scene Columns = The Flibbertigibbet

Flibbertigibbet sounds like an old fashioned word to describe a wonky hangman’s tool. In fact it describes a gossiping person.

I discovered the word quite by mistake but it amused me greatly as markets are full of flibbertigibbets. A market is of course the perfect breeding ground for such a creature. A number of people trapped for long periods in the same spot with an influx of visitors carrying fresh material to be dissected and disseminated describe market life nicely.

The flibbertigibbet can live on any stall but of course it divides its time between many others, large ears flapping and tongue protruding hungry for the latest hot topic. Any subject is worthy of endless repetition providing it is salacious, fairly ridiculous or may cause harm to the victim(s).

Nobody is safe from the flibbertigibbet and anyone can become the object of flibbertigibbeting. Choose a new product for your stall, increase your stall’s frontage, increase or lower your prices, drive home taking a different route, chat too long to a member of the opposite sex, wear something out of the ordinary, accidentally ignore someone, smile at the Toby, or any countless number of actions and you could get flibbertigibbeted – it’s a serious risk.

Flibbertigibbet also suggests a restless person and you will on a quiet day see traders wandering about flexing their limbs, yawning, stretching and generally looking for something to do or someone to chat to. Once set up is complete long hours stretch aching for interaction or just plain action.

The origins of the word are not certain but it is generally assumed to represent the sound of meaningless speech. How many of us have encountered that on any day of the week? Actually we try hard to entertain one another in quiet times and it is amazing how many topics can be covered in humorous and inventive ways.

Every evening my family love to hear the latest gossip, jokes and general trivia as well as more serious opinions and information imparted. Because it’s not all frivolous fun you know. It’s rare for me to return home without some tale to tell of market life. Indeed it is eagerly anticipated along with the dirty jokes that are typically rife and tales of intriguing customers.

If you don’t want to become a flibbertigibbet, after all it conjures up a quite ridiculous image in my mind (big ears, long tongue); the trick is to let the gossip stop with you. Don’t be tempted to immediately repeat the juicy titbit. Savour and bury is my motto. Who knows when the knives will be out for you, besides how much of it is likely to be true?

On occasion a story is invented and passed around for pure entertainment, Chinese Whispers grow into Norfolk orations worthy of a stage.

Perhaps it is time for a new word to enter our language – ‘Flibbertitrader’?

Another side to the media

Following on from my post the other day, where I mentioned how negative the media can be about markets, they can also be most helpful to business!

Years ago I remember how popular a particular heart shape pendant became when worn by the barmaid in Coronation St (popular UK soap for those from abroad who don't know it.) I became inundated with requests for the same style.

This only happens once in a blue moon and as a buyer I am always careful not to get too carried away by any particular craze which can literally die as quickly as it comes in and you don't want to end up with a load of stock you can't sell. It's a tricky balance.

More recently I happened to switch on GMTV only to view a fashion feature on scarves. Naturally I was delighted that they did my job for me in telling folk what a brilliant accessory scarves are, how they can brighten and add style to any outfit as well as all the usual practical uses (such as keeping warm, hiding upper arms, protecting a neck/shoulder prone to stiffness.)

A few days later I overheard a Northern lady on my stall remark to her friends about the GMTV fashion feature as she noticed our display of scarves. A positive mention for a product on national TV makes a big difference to sales. So thanks GMTV! It makes up a little bit for past negative comments on 'dodgy market traders'.

Another benefit of TV is that a lot of news presenters are of course up to the minute with their fashion and have been wearing costume jewellery. I often hear "ooh that's just like a necklace I saw on that girl from Anglia News the other day, or BBC Look East." Free advertising is magic and much needed!

For fabulous costume jewellery in Norfolk visit the Myriad Life Jewellery & Scarf Stall at Fakenham Auction Site market every Thursday, Diss every Friday and Sheringham Saturday. We are at these markets all year round ready to offer friendly personal service, try on the jewellery (excluding earrings for pierced ears) or scarf you like before you buy - we have a mirror handy!

Check this out

http://thehollywoodlookforless.blogspot.com/

I thought this was fun - why not check it out. Hey, we all want to look good, don't we?

Markets - An unfair press

Browsing through the magazines during a recent hospital visit I came across a copy of Which Magazine. I flicked through the pages picking up some (what I thought might be useful tips) when I came across a small article about buying batteries.

Apparently a Which magazine researcher had bought a packet of batteries for a pound from a market stall in North London only to find that they didn't last as long as a leading brand of batteries. So the researcher came to the conclusion that people should never buy batteries from markets because they don't last long.

Market stalls and their traders often get a bad portrait painted of them by the media in general. "You're not up to much, you're only a market trader." Comments like this are often to be heard on popular soaps such as Eastenders.

This is so unfair. All sectors of business have good and bad traders, be it shops, service industries, manufacturers and so on. Markets provide great value shopping, the majority of traders are good, honest, hardworking people who offer friendly personal service through all weathers, all year round.

To damn markets and their traders with such irresponsible articles and scriptwriting is unfair and wrong. Don't be put off by what you read because it isn't always true. Visit a market near you and find out for yourself.